The Year I Peaked

My Prime Year

I was scrolling my Facebook feed when this showed up in my Facebook Memories. This particular picture taken from Mass Comm Society’s official Facebook page from 2018 from their album titled “Hollywood Night: Trip Down The Memory Lane.” If memory serves me correct, this was the second Member’s Gathering by MCS that year, and the one thing that attracted me to this picture was my long hair tied up in a ponytail. My hair was also thick, which is a far cry from my thinning hairline today.

Seeing me in this form today instantly triggered something within my brain and made me come to the realisation that 2018 was the year where I was in my prime – something I definitely have taken for granted, or that I have completely forgotten considering what I ended up going through between then and now. I wasn’t a wealthy man, but I had pretty much everything a teenager could have fantasized – long hair, loud car, lots and lots of good times. I prioritised fun above all else. A Rebel Without A Cause. I didn’t care much about grades, even though I should have. I had friends of common interests left and right, and all I did most of the time was hang out at Starbucks with them, occasionally revving our cars out much to the annoyance of other patrons within the 100-meter radius. It was, without doubt, a good time.

However, 2018 also marked a watershed moment in my life. Without going into detail, my family was experiencing financial downfall. One by one, I started to lose a lot of everything, and my coping mechanism further exacerbated my eventual downfall. I begin to fail subjects even the ones “seemingly impossible to fail” just because I didn’t feel like doing the assignments given. I started overspending on my car which ruined it. There were so many things I had lost, but I’ll briefly summarise it to just three of them – money, motivation and time. Arguments breaking out between family members, especially after the passing of one, were simply distressing to witness, and I was unfortunately caught up in the crossfire no matter how far I tried to run. Looking back to it now, I believe that my actions in 2018 have a direct consequence of where I am today. I was at crossroads, and I had chosen the wrong path, one driven by desperation rather than rationale.

Of course, I’m still trying to rebuild myself, rising from the ashes. I may not have the glory days that I enjoyed in 2018, and that’s okay. All I’m trying to do now is rectify all my mistakes and get my degree over with. The years have not been kind to me, and I am ever grateful that 2022 has allowed me to “take a breather” after all that has happened. I would like to thank my friends for being there with me and I pray that God will forever give me the strength and motivation to carry on this journey.

 

Written by,

Luqman Hakim

StudentInk Writer